Friday, December 21, 2007

Handguns Roasting on an Open Fire

For years, Miami-area highways and bus terminals have featured gigantic billboards illustrating a semi-automatic weapon with the text “10. 20. Life” under the handgun. The numbers represent the minimum prison sentence an individual will receive for pulling a firearm on someone. Simply stated, 10 years for making the gun visible, 20 for firing the weapon and life in prison if someone is shot and killed. Surely other cities in the great state of Florida advertise criminal penalties, but too my knowledge, no more than those in the South Florida region.

Anyhow, Fitzroy Salesman, a Miramar city commissioner was arrested and charged with aggravated assault with a deadly weapon, a felony, according to various news reports.

Mr. Salesman and another individual were witnessed in a minor verbal altercation at a local supermarket around the Thanksgiving holiday. NBC6 Online reported that Lazavious Hudson, the victim, told Mr. Salesman to continue the minor dispute outside which subsequently resulted with the commissioner’s loaded gun poking Mr. Hudson’s side.

Nearly a month later, Mr. Salesman turned himself into authorities, and was released on bail. He has yet to make a personal statement, and his lawyer said that his client felt threatened, therefore pulled out a loaded handgun at the Winn Dixie.

Florida Gov. Charlie Crist said that because the charge is a felony, Mr. Salesman has been suspended indefinitely.

This is not Mr. Salesman first run-in with the law, or the first time the governor has suspended him. He was previously suspended for a DUI charge, though he was acquitted of the charge at trial.

Remember the 10. 20. Life? It was reported that the suspended commissioner is actually only facing a maximum sentence of three years if convicted. More than likely he’ll serve 16-months, and be released on good behavior, if even found guilty. His name will be added to the long list of shady South Florida politicians and in no time, he’ll be back on the streets recklessly waving around a loaded gun while under the influence of Kentucky Gentleman. Happy Holidays from South Florida.

Cheers,
Victor

Wednesday, December 19, 2007

Lil Wayne: No Homo?

I’m not one to read Hip Hop magazines, nor do I watch BET, and in reality, I rarely listen to urban music at all. But as of late I’ve been listening to Lil Wayne’s music occasionally and noticed some queer occurrences in his catalog of mediocre rap.

I did a little research on the New Orleans rapper and was surprised to find out that Bryan “Baby” Williams, also known-as “Birdman,” is not his biological father, rather a mentor he met in his early years. Sometime last year, a photograph surfaced that showed the two grown men kissing—an understandable act given the nature of their relationship, but a bit odd given the intensity captured by paparazzi. Lil Wayne is pictured tilting his head towards his left side, while Birdman is eagerly awaiting the sloppy peck, tilting his head towards his right. The picture paved the path for homosexual rumors.

Williams was asked about the photograph on Q93, a hip-hop station in their native New Orleans. He told DJ Uptown Angela, “Before I had a child, Wayne and all of them were my children, you hear me?” In semi-proper English he continued saying, “Wayne to me is my son—my first born son—and that’s what it do for me. That’s my life, that’s my love, and that’s my thing. That’s my lil’ son. I love him to death.”

After the publicity stunt, more rumors hit the Internet, and alleged Williams of molesting Wayne as a child, though those reports are rarely, if ever, discussed.

When Wayne’s song “We Taking Over (Remix)” was released, the first use of the word “homo” was introduced to me. Though he could’ve possibly said the word in various other tracks—most of the time it sounds like mumbling—the track’s opening lines, “Yezzsir/It’s me…the rapper eater…feed me feed me feed me. No homo,” features the word clearly.

Though it is intended as a slap in the face for all the critics calling Wayne gay, the 10th line of the song, “Damn right I kiss my daddy,” suggests a double meaning, possibly meaning, sure, I kiss my daddy, the man that isn’t really my daddy.

Wayne also lives by the motto, “Fuck bitches. Get money.” Though the majority of Wayne fans will actually associate the motto with having sex with women and making money, skeptic counterparts feel as if though there is a deeper, darker meaning behind the simple line: forget women, just make money. This is where my ‘Lil Wayne might actually be gay’ mentality is introduced.

In a number of songs, many of which I don’t know the name of because remixes, mix tapes, and full length albums make it nearly impossible to keep up with, Wayne will rhyme a word with homo for the sake of reminding everyone he is, in fact, no homo. For example, he rhymes Tony Romo with homo (ironically the quarterback’s team won three championships in the 90’s, and was lead by Troy Aikmen, a sometimes rumored homosexual), and the line doesn’t even make sense. I’ve also heard songs that say he’s rich, but not a homo. What the fuck does that mean?

The liberally used word and the fact Wayne includes it in many of his songs is a subconscious way of stepping out of his metaphorical closet and embracing his homosexuality. Though Lil Wayne is reportedly engaged to a woman, possibly a cover-up for the fact that he is gay, the day the state of Louisiana allows same sex marriages, which will likely never happen, this writer believes Lil Wayne and Bryan Williams will once again engage in a disturbing kiss, only this time at the altar. It’s not my cup of tea, but the thought of a thug with tattooed teardrops, bullet wounds and a gold mouth grill surrounded by shirtless men and a male video hoe is hilarious.

Cheers,
Victor